Friday, December 18, 2009

Shithouse.

I read these qoutes in the news today.

-Hugo Chávez, the president of Venezuela, described Obama's speech as "ridiculous" and the US's initial offer of a $10bn fund for poor countries in the draft text as "a joke".

-Hillary Clinton's announced yesterday that America would support a $100bn global fund to help developing nations adapt to climate change.

WHAT???!!!???!!!???!!!

What the hell is going on?! We are literally printing money to give to developing nations, to help “adapt” to a phony problem! We don’t even have any money in the first place! We are 12 TRILLION dollars in debt… TRILLION. 12. WTF.

Wanna freak the fuck out? Yes? Ok: http://www.usdebtclock.org/

If you don’t see how ludicrous this has become then you are apart of the problem. These disgusting “politicians” cannot seriously be called our “leaders”. How and what do they lead? They are leading our country to the grave. Just about every single one should be lined up against a wall and shot. Call me a radical, a hot-head or just plain nuts, but we have continually elected megalomaniacs into office who use the Constitution as toilet paper and roll doobies with billion dollar bills. We fly Obama out to Copenhagen on the taxpayer’s dime to discuss climate change when on our home turf, our own people are being kidnapped, murdered and terrorized by drug smugglers and pot-growers.

Take a good look. This is the shit that goes on at our border...

We have black and white issues, with zero political strings attached that are being ignored in favor of feel-good “issues” like climate change. We have armed invaders in our national forest that murder hunters, hikers, and campers to protect their dope fields. Hey Obama, send the fucking Marines into our forests and give our bad-ass men in uniform some trigger time. Are we not a sovereign nation? And it wouldn't cost much more than regular military training (an increased budget may be required for body-bag expenses for dope traffickers). Since when do we allow armed invaders, in the name of pot-dealing, to terrorize OUR OWN CITIZENRY?!!! Jesus-H-Topps I feel like I’m 9 miles high on dope!

Only a dickless nob needs a magazine to tell them how
to dress and give them "man advice". Waking up and
having your outfit selected and laid out on your dresser
by your mom is manlier than a GQ subscription.

It’s not just Obama. Hell, I’ll give him a pass. I mean, I just can’t imagine being born dickless and spineless. Must be a bummer. But I won’t give a pass to wannabe tough-guy Republicans who are too afraid to confront the ugly den of thieves and murderers that have set up shop in our country. Every ounce of political news is disheartening and maddening.

Here is the scary part. Have you ever worked on a project (could be a paper, a drawing, model airplane, sugar-cube California Spanish Mission) and started fucking it up so bad that you obliterated it and started over? We are going down that road. It might be time to white out the canvas and start painting again.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Fatsos

I am so sick of hearing commercials for weight loss products/ services/ gimmicks. It’s not just that the commercials have irritating jingles or that they are narrated by fat Mexican chicks that lost weight and still sound fat... It’s the nauseating tone of entitlement in the ads. “Get the body you deserve!” Wait, what? These products shouldn’t even exist if you take that tagline at face value.

Guess what?

Eating 4 or 5 breakfasts every morning already gave you the burrito shaped body that you’ve always deserved!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Fuck Tom Sizemore!

So I wrote an entire blog devoted to how pissed I get when Tom Sizemore appears in war movies. It was funny, insightful, and dumb (just the way I like it). Anyway, it got erased when I tried to preview it. I am asking my self, "Why did I try to preview the thing I just wrote?" My only answer is Goddddamnittttt!



I was trying to post this picture:
















Maybe it was meant to not be seen (likely).

But really, WTF is this guy doing in all sorts of war movies? If you saw him at a bar, you would be annoyed. If he was your cousin, you would dread family functions. If he was your boyfriend, you would have an array of excuses for the routine black eyes and bruises you would have.

Need I say more? I believe I said it best in the title.



FUCK TOM SIZEMORE